BB1232 : Silly Northern 'addock !

Thursday 4th October 2012

Kill Synchrotron.  Dead.
"What on earth is he waffling about this time?" I hear the cry.  
Or maybe: "Where can I get some of those pills that he's taking?"

This has a strange relevance to today's outing, which, if you stagger through to the end of our physical, and my verbal, ramblings will be come clear.  Maybe.

Tony, that cranky, droll hedonist, was the only pal playing out today.  So we decided to do something that would impress Bryan- not just the fact that we were doing it but that we were doing it without his help!

The tunnel, with light at the end thereof

Low Sizergh Farm

Having cheated and bought the course card a couple of days beforehand meant that Tony could concentrate on buying and eating his noon time essentials in the cafe.  Yes, we started late and were travelling light.

Sizergh Castle

I explained to Tony that there were fifteen "randomly" sited markers to be found by consulting a map with circles showing their approximate location.  Each contained a number to be written down on the answer sheet.

The first site was obvious.  For the second we took a more direct route than the organisers intended.  I slipped down an outcrop so shrieked out a warning: "Tony - Darned hill rocks!"  He sensibly took a safer route.

Thereafter Tony proved to be increasingly confident as a navigator and succesfully guided us round the full course, all targets being located.

I have all the photographic evidence if necessary but it would be unfair to publish the detailed proof, thereby depriving others of the pleasure of the search and the National Trust the pleasure of the money!!  I could relate a false story but you would only complain that my talks conned horridly.

Arnside Knott, no Blackpool Tower (see later)

Solo tree

Rather than return to base after securing the final objective, we decided to add an extra challenge, namely to seek out the Simm Well in Brigsteer Park, as marked on the OS map.  En-route, we passed a gate with what at first look like moles hanging therefrom, then some twig houses.

To our surprise, it started bucketing down, something that the weather was not supposed to do today.  We did find the well but rather than the dry overgrown spring about which I had read on the internet, it was absolutely gushing with water.

Having returned to the Castle and being awarded a badge for having full marks on our score sheet, we then decided to put our National Trust Cards to good use and go round the castle.  

Despite there being no obvious connection to Tony's other woman, Lady Ann Clifford, this had been his suggestion and a good one.  In fact the family that donated the Sizergh Castle to the National Trust (and still live in a wing) are the gloriously named Horneyold-Stricklands.

Mrs HS is actually the Lord of the Manor where I live and owns Helm, the hill overlooking Natland, where I am a Commoner (with the right to gather bracken and graze one sheep for something like 38 days per year).

We were not allowed to take photos inside the castle so, sadly, I can't show you the particular picture that caught my eye.  It was one of the ancestors who had a horridly slanted conk.

Likewise, you will just have to imagine the look of this medieval structure with its myriad of ancient family paintings, panelled rooms and period furniture,  Or go and see things for yourself - it is well worth a visit.

Next we visited an ancient barn which Tony described as being more like a tiny Rock-and-Roll shed.

Cultured out at last, we trotted down the road to a more familiar type of house- the Strickland Arms which is fast becoming the BOOTboys' local (and I still love that fox hunting music print - see BB1229).

What I omitted from previous reports is to reveal who it is that drinks trendy alcohol at the pub.  It is in fact the tiny shocker landlord.

"What's he on about now?  And what's the relevance to Kill Synchrotron.  Dead. ?"

Well, it's simple.  I know I am just a Silly Northern 'addock but it amused me!

All the items in italics are anagrams of that magnificent nomenclature Horneyold-Strickland.  Nowt more than that!

 Don, 4th October 2012

PS  Aren't your relieved that I didn't weave  Oh! kindly, scrotal nerd. into the story? !!

Blackpool Bull Fails To Baffle Towering Brain

JHy has proved to be a rather sceptical member of our ranks.  And, as it transpires, rightly so.  For years I have taken as gospel what those with better eyesight have told me, particularly with regard to the location and visibility of Blackpool Tower.

But now I know that some, but not all, of the photos that have been previously supplied to me purportingly showing the Tower and published in good faith can now be confirmed as fakes.  

John's brain took to the air to prove that far from lying to the right of the Heysham power stations as BB1230 would suggest, when seen from Hutton Roof it is to the left.  

Applying scientific analysis to the problem, I have been able to confirm his contention and thereby reveal the sad fact that some of my BOOTboy colleagues may indeed be fraudsters.

Further investigation shows that the line of coincidence of the two features, when extended northwards, passes over Benson Knott, near Kendal, to Knock Fell on the Pennines and on to the East Coast at Bamburgh.  However, if you think you can see the Tower from beyond Knock Fell, let me know what pills you are on and I'll have some.

It follows that those who claim to have seen the Tower to the right of the nuclear power stations whilst on Scout Scar (BB1229) might not be charlatans.  But then again..... !

I can further confirm John's findings through having revisited Hutton Roof.  Using my more powerful camera with its mega zoom, the following is revealed:

QED as we mathematicians say.

Incidentally, the line of coincidence also flows over Arnside Knott hence our inability today to add to the debate.

 STATISTICS:

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        Doctor slinky handler.