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A Tale of Bollards, Burdens
and Beers
Thursday
10th September 2026
“Bollards,” exploded John as he turned up the road
that leads to Rydal Hall.
“I beg your pardon,” I responded somewhat prudishly,
thinking he’d used a word not dissimilar in sound.
“Bollards,” repeated John. "They’ve gone and put chains
and bollards so that we can’t park on the road."
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“Don’t worry,” I told him. “I phoned the Hall yesterday and cleared it
that we could park up there.”
Perhaps I should explain that Rydal Hall, sometimes
known as the Bishop’s Palace, is a Christian Conference Centre. Indeed I do need to explain, as at the gate we
found a sign saying:
CAR PARK CLOSED
Residents and Day Delegates Only
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“Bollards” said John.
At least I think that’s what he said.
Maybe I was wrong again.
“Don’t worry,” said Stan. “Look, you can park at Rydal Mount. The house is closed and Wordsworth won’t
mind.”
Of course he wouldn’t mind- it’s a pay by phone place
now. But at least we were able to park
and were shortly joined by Mike and Robert.
Indeed, we have Robert to thank for this outing. He is planning a walk for his U3A group next
week and this was, at least in part, going to be a recce. One difference, however; we would be going
clockwise around Rydal Water whereas he would be taking his group anti-clockwise.
The reason for us going clockwise was that I wanted to
get to Rydal Caves as early as possible as there we would have to make a decision. Should we climb up to the top of Loughrigg or
opt instead for the much easier Loughrigg Terrace?
We arrived at the lower cave where Margaret and I had
once been enchanted by a choir rehearsing- wonderful acoustics- and then
rounded the corner to the larger cave, exploration of which is mandatory.
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Now the big decision had to be made. The critical thing was the weather. The forecast was for rain to begin at 11 and
become heavy by 1. We had had to make a latish
start and it looked like the weather was starting to close in so we wimped out
and took the Terrace, enjoying the views over Rydal Water......
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..... and then Grasmere.
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At the far end of the lake, we entered the woods and
it did start to rain somewhat; just how hard I don’t know as we were
effectively sheltered and by the time we emerged down at the Grasmere shore, it
had stopped.
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Indeed, the lull encouraged
us to have a coffee stop which in turn encouraged the ducks to see what crumbs
they could obtain from us.
The next section made a valuable contribution to
Robert’s planning. Rather than cross the river, I chose the path that continued
alongside to the next footbridge.
However, it became somewhat tricky underfoot so (and this might a useful
tip in the unlikely event that any who reads this is tempted to follow in our
footsteps) he concluded that the path on the other side of the river, though
possibly less interesting, would be the easier.
Once we had crossed the main road, there was the small
waterfall to admire then the steep climb up the hill to reach the Coffin Route.
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Across Rydal Water, Loughrigg
was looking un-enticing in the distance.
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We paused at the stone on which it is said that the coffin
would be laid to give the bearers some respite as they took their burden from
Ambleside to Grasmere for burial. This
led to discussion as to whether they would actually have carried a coffin. We thought it much more logical to strap the
body to a pony. Maybe they did but
carried an empty coffin. But was there
no carpenter in Grasmere to provide one?
Maybe it was just the gentry that required a fine coffin and for it to
be carried in style?
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On reaching the cars, the next inevitable decision had
to be made. The verdict was in favour of
lunch at the Eagle and Child.
At first, I
thought they were serving white wine from the hand pumps. However, on closer
examination it became clear that the content of the barrel was Sauvignon Blond,
not Sauvignon Blanc.
Naturally this had
to be sampled. It was only then that we discovered
that, today, there was no chef and hence no lunch.
Once again, I thought I heard John mention
Bollards.
Ever resourceful, we resolved
the problem.
Another pint and a packet
of crisps please, landlord.
What a
burden.
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Don, Thursday 10th September
2026
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